Ancestral Healing – The Cauldron Goddess

Healing the Witch Wound

What is the Witch Wound?

Healing the Witch Wound is a bit of a hot topic these days, which I feel is a good thing, because it means folks are waking up to a call deep within to heal ancestral pain and reclaim their power.

The Witch Wound is a collective wound rooted in our ancestral memory and our DNA from persecution and death related to colonisation, the burning times, patriarchy, capitalism and religious extremism. It is a deep and collective ancestral wound we all may carry to varying degrees, and for many, it is still carrying a traumatic charge.

The Witch Wound can manifest in our current life as several fears, including fears of:

Speaking up or speaking our truth
Persecution
Being different or an outcast
Standing in our own power
Success or being in the limelight
Trusting our intuition
Our body and it’s natural functions
Being feminine, female or gender non-conforming
The wild/nature
The unseen and spirit world
Pursuing a spiritual or alternative lifestyle or profession
Calling yourself a Witch, Pagan, Priestess, or other similar identification publicly

As a result of these fears, we may resort to excessive people pleasing, dismissing our intuition, dissociating from the body or present moment, distrust of the body or fear nature, and more. There are many avenues and layers to the healing process, and I feel that each generation and everyone is drawn to their own way of healing it for themselves.

One interesting exercise is to simply notice what thoughts and feelings come to you when you hear the word ‘witch’?

Witch!

What comes to mind?

A warty, ugly hag with a crooked hat riding a broom?

A powerful, sexual, but immoral or ‘evil’ woman?

A woman speaking her mind bluntly or exerting her will?

A strange healer or non-conformist who lives in the woods, mumbling to plants?

Our negative associations with the word Witch are often rooted in the Witch Wound. For hundreds of years those that lived on the fringe, had spiritual abilities, utilised plant medicine, were women or gender non-conforming, or who held Indigenous perspectives and traditions, have been ostracized, oppressed or targeted through genocide.

Witch is a charged word, one that I choose to identify myself with, because I feel it is an act of reclaiming of its power to do so. It’s a way of bringing the word back into it’s true meaning of a Wise Woman, Healer and Magickal Person. Calling myself a Witch means I’m someone who lives in tune with the spirits of nature, lives by their intuition, who creates and transforms at will- and proud of it.

Even to this day, however, I sometimes struggle in being openly a Witch. While there is much more acceptance than a generation or two ago, it’s still sometimes scary to identify.

Even if you would never identify as a Witch, you still may carry the Witch Wound, which would show up in the list of fears above.

Persecution & Practical Magic

Practical Magic- My fave witchy movie with Sandra Bullock & Nicole Kidman

One of my most recurring fears is that of persecution. I feel a familiarity with the scene in my favorite witch movie, Practical Magic where the mob of children yell at the young Owens sisters ‘Witch, Witch, you’re a Bitch!” repeatedly, pointing their accusing fingers at them. Even at a tender young age, the girls were tormented for being descendants of Witches, making them immediate outcasts who had to find their magic within to empower themselves.

The girls’ Witch ancestor, Maria Owens was persecuted and set to be executed in the Salem Witch Trials. She used her magic to escape, but eventually died of a broken heart, and cursed her entire line of descendants that any man who falls in love with an Owens woman will die.

This, of course, sets the plot around the adult Owens sisters, Sally and Gilly, who are struggling with their love lives, losing the men they love. They attempt use magic to fix things, only to make them messier.

My favourite part of the movie is at the end, when Sally and Gilly need a full coven of 13 women to complete a ritual to de-possess Gilly from her abusive dead ex-boyfriend. They are forced to call upon the local, judgy townswomen to come over to help. The women could empathise with wanting to banish an ex, so they managed to put aside their supposed differences, and reconnected with their own power in a circle to heal Gilly. The women found and accessed their own Witch-Power within, through sisterhood and empathy- and made some magick happen! From then on, the Owens family could walk through town being themselves, torment-free, perhaps for the first time in generations.

I love this movie so much because it illustrates how we carry biases, curses and shame for generations, and how it only takes one person making a new, bold decision to end the chain of suffering. Sometimes the only action we need to take is to be ourselves, authentically and openly. It also illustrates how we all have a little ‘witch’ within us, and when we become more comfortable with that part of ourselves, we can love it in others too.

“There’s a little witch in all of us”
Aunt Jet Owens

I feel the ancestors are smiling upon those who dare come out of the broom closet, who dare be themselves and live a magical life in this very uncertain world. To all those who are doing this work, take a deep breath, and remember that you are very brave.

The Healing Spiral

Healing the Witch Wound is a lifelong process. I naively thought a few times that I had healed this wound within myself over the years as I started getting more comfortable with who I am, committing to this path and moving away from conditioning. However, it’s been more like a healing spiral that comes around again and again for new layers of deeper work to do. I have come a long way but am nowhere near ‘completely healed’ if that’s a thing.

I still fear persecution. I still feel insecure in myself. I still make myself small, so others feel safer. The world keeps changing and it’s sometimes hard to know when to stand my ground and when to adapt. When to be visible and when to be invisible. When to share my spiritual gifts and when to have boundaries. Like Sally Owens from Practical Magic, I sometimes just long to feel normal and fit in. But life often teaches me that I’m not meant to fit in, and that’s ok!

“My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being normal is not necessarily a virtue? It rather denotes a lack of courage!”
Aunt Frances Owens

When we are doing this work reclaiming our authenticity, being bold and brave and ‘out’- I feel we still need to be discerning and it’s ok to have boundaries that keep us safe. What feels safe for me here in Toronto, may not feel safe for a Witch living in a small town in the US Bible Belt. The cost of being oneself is different for every individual.

While it takes courage, bravery and a willingness to start a fire here and there, it can be wise to remember that ‘You don’t need set yourself on fire just to keep others warm’. Self-sacrifice isn’t necessarily the way to help or create change. Courage to be yourself in the capacity that you can handle is a powerful act. In being yourself, you give others permission to do the same. While we may not always fit in, we are never as alone as we think we are.

Gentle Reconnection with your Inner Witch

The first step of healing the Witch Wound is connecting to your Inner Witch. Your Inner Witch may have many facets, and it’s ok if you’re not ready to explore them all yet. She may have been persecuted, exploited, oppressed, or hidden for survival over generations, and you carry that memory in your nervous system and DNA. Some parts may feel more comfortable to connect with than others. For instance, connecting with plants more intimately may feel safer than ritual, spells or doing shadow work.

I am a fan of gentle reconnection to one’s Inner Witch. This is a tender, yet very powerful part of yourself that cannot be rushed or forced out. And even when the Witch IS out, it may be a long journey of fully accepting and embracing her.

If you are interested in healing your Inner Witch, here are a few suggestions that have helped me:

Intentionally commune with nature as often as you can. Whether it is tending an indoor plant, spending more time outside, or talking to a neighbourhood tree, remember that you ARE nature, and it is YOU. You don’t need to have a green thumb or extensive herbal knowledge to be a Witch. You don’t necessarily need an intermediary to teach you. You have a right to a relationship with the earth. Cultivate your own connection with nature. Choose a tree to have a relationship with. When the sun shines on your face or when you dip your toes into water, acknowledge the elements as beings in their own right, that offer themselves to you and wish to get to know you in return. Even if you are sitting in a fluorescent-lit office in a downtown high rise, you can take a deep breath, close your eyes and connect with your favourite place outdoors in your mind. Surround yourself with reminders of the natural world on your desk or whenever you can’t be outside.

Practice Gratitude. As cliché as it may sound, taking a few minutes every morning and evening to connect with what you are grateful for opens you to the abundance that supports you, and this is essential when doing brave work of healing. It reminds you that you are loved and supported, you are not alone. It may be interesting to note who you are giving thanks to. What higher power do you believe in? When you cultivate gratitude, you grow your spiritual support system and strengthen your trust in yourself, in others and in the unseen, which is a trust that the Witch Wound often erodes.

Tap into your intuition. It’s easy to bypass this wisdom as we are conditioned to dismiss intuition for logic in every situation. Take some time to regularly practice re-connecting to your innate knowing. You may feel intuition as a flash of insight, a gut instinct or a tug in your body somewhere. Next time you need to make a decision, even as small as deciding what to eat or where to park you car, check in with your sixth sense. Discerning intuition from other parts of ourselves may be tricky at times. To navigate this process, you may wish to read my blog ‘Is it my intuition? 5 Ways to Tell.’

Explore different beliefs and paths. There are many different Pagan paths, so it can take some time and experimentation to find what resonates with you. If your chosen path deviates from how you were raised or the dominant belief system in your environment, this can be where the Witch Wound fears show up. Know that you are not alone. We often rely on the trailblazing of others, so seek out elders who have paved the path before you. Perhaps YOU are the Trailblazer of your generation, making it easier for the younger generations to be themselves, OR you may be a Bridge-Maker who facilitates movement between different belief systems and ways of thinking.

Explore your fears. When you are more comfortable with the above suggestions, you may wish to look at the list of Witch Wound fears from the top of this blog and choose one to work on. Perhaps the one that stands out strongly or comes up most regularly for you. Take some time to reflect on where this fear stems from. Childhood memories or trauma? Social conditioning growing up? A deep memory in your bones, in your DNA, or a past life? It may be something worth exploring through journaling, reflection or a therapist.

Connect with community. The digital age has made it much easier for Witches to find each other! Whether it is through social media, a local gathering, or just emailing a Witch blogger like me to say hello or ask a question- connecting with like-minded souls is very healing! I know how intimidating it can be to reach out or meet new people. You are welcome to email me any time with your questions or comments!

Your Inner Witch is beautiful, wise and powerful. Your journey is unique and sacred. May you thrive and grow as you break generational curses and stand tall in your power!

If you are looking for witchy community, you may with to check out my Hearthfire Circles– which are both online and in-person.

Serena

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As a Witch who makes her home and practice in Tkaronto (Toronto) Ontario, I deeply thank the original stewards of this land: The Mississaugas of the Credit, Mississaugas of Scugog, Alderville, Hiawatha & Curve Lake; The Chippewas of Beausoleil, Rama & Georgina island, the Haudenosaunee and Wendat nations. I acknowledge the resilience of the First Nation, Inuit and Metis people who live and work here in the present, in a system of inequity and oppression. I am working on uncolonising my own practice, amplifying Indigenous voices and supporting Indigenous communities in whatever way I can.

Healing Allies for Transitions, Grief & Sensitive Souls

I am one of those people who feels grief in the spring, like many do in the fall. My introverted, sensitive soul likes her winter cave of darkness, reflection and inner work. The call of spring to sprout, grow, move upward and outward sometimes blares overwhelmingly like a morning alarm clock, bringing up resistance, grief and also hope within me, all blending into an overwhelmingly emotional breakfast smoothie.

This year’s 28 C weather in mid April (normal high 10 C), has been a tad jarring, thrusting us from a thundering snow storm into full-on summer mode. The city heat came in pounding with traffic, noise and chaos whilst new leaves bud on the trees and birds sang their sweet praises to the awakening Earth. The city has been a cacophony of new life in both lovely and stressful forms.

Although we are soon to get cold weather again, the process of changing seasons can be volatile and challenging to our body and mind.

On the first hot day, I instinctively went for a walk in the nearby cemetery to soothe my dark witchy soul amongst all the new light, heat and noise. I traded my black boots for light walking shoes and went out to greet the sun in one of the only reliable anchors of peace in an urban landscape.

Cemeteries are those rare places reserved for sanctuary, reflection and rest. A place where we can tap into the inward season of Samhain any time of year, giving space to our grief for what’s passing away while new life begins.

Growth and grief always flow together, and yet our patriarchal, capitalistic culture only values the ‘growth’ aspect of life.

The spring season sometimes triggers the feminine wound within me, around the cultural binary that associates growth, light, extroversion, productivity, logic, masculine and yang energy as preferable and superior; Whilst release, darkness, introversion, rest, receptivity, feminine, intuitive and yin energy are considered bad or inferior. Yet one always lies within the other, and beauty is found within both.

I tend to lean towards the Dark Goddess as a Witch, as I work with Cerridwen and resonate with Crone/Wise Woman energy. I was born in deep winter during a waning moon, and a heavy dose of Scorpio energy in my astrology chart. We carry the energies of the moon phase and season we were born in. For me, transformation, release, and darkness feel like home, even though they can also be difficult and painful.

While transition and loss are painful, when I speak of darkness, it is not equated with evil in my mind. To me, darkness is equated with the Great Mystery, the Sacred Womb, the Source of Life. It is peace, surrender, the quiet void of death and the nascent beginning of life. It is the metaphorical Cauldron that holds us safe as we shed old skins and grow into new ways of being. It holds great beauty, power and solace. It’s essence, to me, is the Dark Goddess. The unknowable void of darkness brings up fear, which is why we don’t like it. But it’s only through moving through our fears that we grow. Like spring seeds sprouting through the ground to greet the sun for the first time, our growth processes may have us feeling tender, exposed and vulnerable.

Even if the old reality we are letting go of was toxic, stunting our growth, or holding us back from our potential- it likely still comes with grief- which is simply a reflection of our capacity to love and live with passion. So this dance we feel during seasons of transition can be emotional and complex, as growth and grief dance together.

As anyone who’s had a baby knows, you can feel intense loss and overwhelm along with the excitement new life. You may also feel a sense of pride, excitement and intense grief as they grow up and become adults.

It’s ok to grieve as you sprout, or sprout as you grieve!

As we are now entering eclipse season, it may feel we are crossing a threshold. Emotions may be close to the surface as we feel something is ending as something else begins. We are in a ‘Cauldron Time’, as I call it, a crucible of death and rebirth.

Perhaps some new beginnings are emerging in your life that ask for you to let go of an old way of being in order to grow. Are you ready to take the plunge? Or are you overwhelmed and paralysed with fear? A bit of both?

We can navigate these times of transition without losing our soul in the process. We can nourish our resilience and support our sensitivity, too. In times like these, we call upon the healing allies in the natural world- trees, elements, herbs and crystals that can help. Simply by being with them in nature, connecting with them through medicines we can move through change with greater ease.

Here are some healing allies I have worked with over the years that can help us navigate times of change, vulnerability and loss. Let me know your experiences with them or feel free to share some of your own!

Trees: Black Willow, Weeping Willow, Pine, Cedar

Trees are beings dear to my heart. I think of each and every one of them as a friend, with their unique personality and energy. You can connect with a tree ally by visiting one in person and giving it an offering, such as an herb, animal-safe food, cleaning up any garbage around it, or simply your loving words and energy. Ask it for permission to be with it, sit against it or lean against it. Become open and receptive to its energy. Ask it for it’s advice.

Willows are my favourite allies for helping us to feel our emotions. Ruled by the moon and most often growing near water, the Willow reminds us that it’s ok to feel what we feel. They hold us in a gentle embrace of unconditional acceptance and love.

Weeping willow is an especially tender ally that can bring tears out to release what we’ve been holding back in our hearts, bringing lightness and clarity. They comfort us in their embrace and soften the rough edges that developed from holding our armor on too tight for too long.

Black Willow looks a bit different- they have very textured, darker bark, more gnarly branches and they do not droop quite like the Weeping variety. They hold more of a Crone/Grandmother energy that offers us a soft shoulder to cry on, along with a bit of extra strength, honesty and down to earth wisdom to keep us grounded. These are native to this land and I hold a special place in my heart for this wise ally.

Pine is thankfully abundant and native here as well, offering us a strong yet soft, cleansing energy to support us through dark times. The refreshing smell of Pine sap offers a new perspective and breath of fresh air. Burning Pine needles is a powerful smoke cleanser. Leaning against a Pine tree and asking it to help transmute heavy energies we are carrying can bring strength and help us to clear old baggage. The Bach Flower Remedy Pine is helpful for releasing guilt, which can come with loss.

Cedar is of course native to this land as well and is one of the 4 sacred medicines of Indigenous communities. Cedar to me, feels like ‘home’, more than any other tree. Perhaps, because this is where I call home. It also harkens to my ancestors who relied on this tree for medicine and shelter. When we are feeling uprooted, out of touch with our body, or our sense of home, this can be a helpful ally. It also has strong protective and cleansing properties. Cedar tea is supportive to the immune system, and its leaves are very protective. Cedar wood is extremely resilient and repels bugs. Sitting, leaning against or hugging a Cedar can bring grounding and protection to the sensitive soul.

Bach Flower Remedies: Walnut, Olive, Rescue Remedy, Olive, Rock Water, Water Violet

I am a huge fan of the Bach Flower Remedies! These are excellent for sensitive souls. They are vibrational medicines created from plants in the tradition of Dr Edward Bach, a British physician and homeopath who developed them in the 1930s.

Each remedy carries the energy of the plant it is made with, which is associated with healing a specific emotional state. They are designed to bring us into balance. I’ve been using them for about 15 years and took a Bach Flower course to understand them better. They are available at many herbal shops and health food stores.

Walnut is my number 1 go-to for sensitive souls in times of transition, such as moving, pregnancy, menopause, relationship breakups, seasonal changes, new job or lifestyle situation. It brings a protective shield of safety when we are feeling vulnerable, when we are sensitive to the energies in the environment and opinions of other people.

Rescue Remedy is a combo of remedies that supports us through trauma and shock. This is a remedy for when the change is too much for our nervous system to process and we are struggling to cope. It is great for sudden accidents, illness/diagnosis of serious illness, sudden loss, coping with changes that have us rattled and shaken, or any situation that has us stressed or anxious. It brings comfort and stability.

Olive is for exhaustion. Whether we’ve been caregiving for others or ill ourself, this is the remedy for the weary soul who can’t seem to get the rest and restoration needed to bring one’s energy level back up. Olive feels energising and protective, bringing more resilience.

Rock Water is made from water flowing over rocks. It is a remedy for those of us who deal with stress by getting overly rigid and perfectionistic. Rock Water helps us to soften our need for a certain state of perfection and embrace the messy processes of life. It smooths our rough, idealistic edges, and lets us relax into the flow.

Water Violet is one of the remedies that help those who get very withdrawn and pull away from other people. It helps to open us up to connecting with others and allows grief to process.

Willow helps when we are feeling vicitmised by our circumstances, having suffered bad luck or problems, making us feel bitter or resentful. It helps us to forgive ourselves and others, and take responsibility for what is ours.

Crystals: Black Tourmaline, Jet, Smokey Quartz, Selenite

Crystals hold powerful vibrations that can help transform and/or protect our energy when placed on the body, worn, placed under our pillow or in our environment.

Black Tourmaline is a strong grounding and protective black crystal, excellent for empaths and spongy-sensitive types who pick up other’s emotions and environmental energies. It’s a good one to wear on one’s person if you are out and about a lot or in contact with people regularly.

Jet is also a black crystal but with a very different energy. It is a type of coal, derived from wood that was changed under extreme pressure. It is soft and can easily absorb excess negative energies such as anger, grief, sadness or fear. It was historically worn as jewelry to funerals. I have often used it to help alleviate physical pain such as headaches and menstrual cramps as well. It requires regular cleansing because of its absorbant nature- you can bury it in the earth, run it under water or smoke cleanse it.

Smokey Quartz is one of my favourite protectors for sensitive souls! Like clear quartz, but a smokey grey-black colour, it helps us to focus and organise our thoughts while warding off negativity beautifully. It is great to wear on your person or carry or have in the environment, like in windowsills or other places you wish to ward off outside vibes.

Selenite is a type of gypsum. It is soft, white and looks like moonlight, named after the Greek moon goddess, Selene. Selenite is one of those crystals that cleanses other crystals that are near it. Unlike Jet, it doesn’t hold onto the energy, but helps it flow, like a stream of cleansing moonlight. When your life or energy feels stagnant, stuck or heavy, place a piece of Selenite on your heart centre, under your pillow or beside your bed. I find it helps protect against heavy and negative energies by transmuting them.

The Elements: Water, Earth, Fire and Air

The beautiful thing about the elements is that they are always around us! All we need to do is pay attention and connect! Whether we take a moment in our busy day to just lean against a tree, splash water on our face, or breathe the air more consciously, the gifts of the Earth Mother are here for us, waiting to connect. Once we begin a relationship with an element, we start to notice it everywhere. Like with trees, you can give thanks by leaving an offering of your energy and gratitude, an herbal offering or animal safe food.

Water helps our emotions to flow and release. Drinking more water, taking baths/showers or simply stepping into a stream or lake can help us flow through the changes upon us with great ease and acceptance.

Earth grounds us and calms the nervous system, helping us to feel safe while things are changing. Anxiety pulls our energy upward, which requires a downward flow for balance. Walking barefoot, massaging our feet or holding a squatting position helps to pull energy downward again. You may also find increasing your protein and iron intake helpful as well.

Fire warms and energises. If the changes we’ve been undergoing have depleted our hope, our spirit or lust for life, the simple act of lighting a candle and receiving its light into your heart can bring a shift in how you feel.

Air brings lightness and can help clear our mind. Using a bird feather to sweep away the negative thoughts or herbal smoke to cleanse your energy and space can bring some peace when chaos is swirling around you.

What remedies or healing allies do you find support you during times of transition? Please share in the comments!

The Earth Mother offers Her healing abundance to us as we navigate stressful times. We simply need to take the first step and connect, remembering we are worthy of support, and that acts of self-care are not selfish, but necessary.

Thank-you for reading,

Serena

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Healing Our Lineage, Healing Ourselves

It took a lot for us to be here. Our existence is due to the choices and sacrifices of those who came before us. Those who birthed us, nurtured us, taught us- however imperfectly- are the reason we are here.

Ancestry and lineage healing are hot topics these days, often frought with mixed feelings. Ancestors are often idealised or demonised. Family is complicated. We may have adopted family, step-family, blood family or soul family. Ways that our roots entangle with others can take many shapes and forms. They can be sources of comfort, love, deep pain or longing.

Something that we can probably agree on, is that tending our roots is deep inner work and part of feeling nourished and secure on this planet. It is also a major part of being a good ancestor for the generations to come. Whether or not you have biological children, we are all future ancestors of this planet. By living here, we make a mark.

Making a connection with our Ancestors

Card from Wisdom of the Cailleach Oracle by Jane Brideson

Beliefs about our ancestors and the dead vary in different cultures and belief systems. Many believe that our ancestors watch over us, guide us and have hopes and wishes for us in our lifetime. Ancestor reverence is common in many cultures, often including an altar with photos, candles and offerings to show respect. Some believe in reincarnation, some don’t. Some believe they will be reunited in death with their loved ones. Some believe that this life is all we’ve got and wish to leave the world a better place for future generations.

Since I can’t speak to the experience of being dead (that I can remember, anyway!) I am open to the variety of ways of looking at death, the afterlife and ancestors. I feel like I want to be a good ancestor for my descendants and future generations. I would also love the job of helping others on earth as a spirit guide one day. I have always been comfortable with the idea of reincarnation too, but with the way humanity is going, I am not sure if I want to back again anytime soon.

I have always felt very spiritually connected to my ancestors. I didn’t grow up with spiritual traditions of ancestor reverence, but I always had this feeling that I was being watched over and protected by ‘family’ beyond the veil. Especially when I was outside, I felt like my ancestors were with me, giving me a deep sense of home and belonging. I truly felt that my family extended beyond my living relatives and were very much in the unseen world. I still feel this today.

I also have been lucky to have access to my family tree and history, which is very well documented and recorded, on both sides. Thanks to the thorough recordkeeping of the Catholic Church and many living relatives on my mom’s side who had a lot of babies to keep track of, I have access to family trees, books and albums that go back hundreds of years. Thanks to the internet, the painstaking efforts of genealogists and genealogically-inclined relatives, I’ve found a lot with little effort and connected with family I haven’t met in person and have lots of info on both sides of my family.

Having access to all this information has made me feel that it is my duty in a way, to remember my ancestors, to read their names and wonder about their lives. To imagine their hardships and what the times they lived in demanded of them.

I know not everyone has access to this info. It can be hard to obtain records, especially if you are adopted or are far away from your birthplace. But I feel you don’t really need documented information to connect with your ancestors or to heal your lineage. Essentially, you ARE the record. Your ancestors live and breathe through you. You carry their gifts and wounds as you live your earthly life, walking the path they gave you.

Being a Good Ancestor

My paternal great-grandparents, Charles Oakley & Sarah McGillivray. Sarah was a descendant of Scottish highlanders who came to Glengarry, ON during the highland clearances. She died of the Spanish flu in 1918, a young mother leaving behind her 2 boys, who were then sent to an orphanage.

In doing my own healing and researching my ancestors, I thought I would feel a greater sense of belonging, but it has actually given me more of a sense of responsibility. A responsibility to use the freedom I have that my ancestors didn’t. To live a good life, to enjoy what I have and to let myself be happy. To be a good parent to my daughter and to be a good ancestor for the future.

For me, ancestral healing is about identifying patterns that were passed down to me- ways of thinking, behaving, wounds and gifts- and create new patterns that are healthier and more life-affirming for my descendants and the next generation.

Some believe that by healing ourselves, we heal not only those who come after us, but those who came before us as well. I like to believe this too.

Whatever healing work you do on yourself– going to therapy, healing and caring for your body, shifting unhealthy inherited patterns of thinking or behaving that your parents modeled- are all ways of healing your lineage. You break the chain and give new freedom to your descendants.

Those of us who are parents often don’t realise we are repeating a pattern until we finally hear ourselves and see the effects we have on our kids. I am mostly proud of myself as a mom for being conscious of my patterns and trying not to repeat them. However, I’m nowhere near perfect and know that my daughter will still have her share of lineage stuff to work through. We all make our own little contribution to the path and hope that it provides more opportunity for those to come.

Healing my Lineage- In my Bones and Blood

My experience living with endometriosis felt like a direct energetic line to my foremothers. I felt that I held all their grief and pain from lost babies, lost dreams and hardship in my own uterus. I can’t prove such a connection, but I feel deep in my bones and blood, that this was true and that I carry a lot of ancestral patterns in my body and energy field. I believe that healing myself is healing my line- before me and after me.

My mother’s lineage holds a strong faith, an ability to be humble and believe in magic and the Divine. We are a lineage of spiritual, hard-working, nurturing mothers and healers. These are gifts passed down to us. But with the gifts, come wounds. Hard-working humility and over-reliance on faith can also become toxic. We can get into a pattern of putting ourselves last, a pattern of feeling guilty or sinful, a pattern of martyrdom that weakens our own creative power and agency. Part of my work is to notice this in myself and shift into new ways.

Learning From the Past, Looking to the Future

Another part of my lineage healing is to take back my own creative power and co-create with the Divine, rather than being subservient to a religion or church. Being a Witch is a major part of this for me. While I respect the beliefs of my ancestors and family members, I feel my healing work comes from breaking away from that institution and following a path that is authentic and free.

I realised at a young age that I didn’t like the formalities of religion and just wanted to be outside where I could hear the whispers of the spirits of nature. I know many of my ancestors resonated with this, too.

My mother eventually broke the mold and veered off her Catholic path to find her authentic way forward, which made it easier for me to go my own way too. At thirteen, I refused my Confirmation and got into Tarot, astrology, Yoga, energy healing, Paganism and never looked back. Sometimes, I feel as though my ancestors are applauding me for this, (maybe not all of them, but some of them, haha) as I am living out their subconscious desires. My older ancestors from times before they were Christianised whisper me encouragement in reviving the old ways.

As a Witch, I reclaim the inner Wild Woman, Creatrix and Wise Woman that my foremothers could not- because of the limitations of the times they lived in. I am still a hard-working, nurturing mother, just one who is trying to balance that with self-care, magick and engaging her creative power.

When the voice of guilt and shame comes up, I gently remind her that by taking care of myself and doing what I love, I am healing my lineage. By following my own path and trusting the Divine as it flows through me, I am healing my lineage.

What gifts and wounds does your lineage carry?

We all have baggage and skeletons in our family closets. We all have victims and perpetrators in our families. We all have those archetypes within us as well. Idealising and demonising doesn’t really do us any good. It is important to remember that no matter who our ancestors were, or who we are, they were human, we are human, and we decide what aspects of ourselves we nurture and which we discontinue.

If you wish, take a moment to reflect on your own family:

What natural gifts or strengths do your parents or grandparents possess?

How are you like them? How are you different?

Do you know the stories of your ancestors?

If you believe your ancestors are watching over you now, what do you think they would say about you? What would they wish for you in this life?

What wounds or challenges run through your family? What did you inherit?

Are you consciously or unconsciously trying to heal this wound?

How are you changing the patterns passed down to you to make a better world for the next generation?

As we enter the time of Samhain, the veil between the worlds is thin, and we can connect more easily to those on the other side. It is a ripe time for ancestral connection and lineage healing. I’d like to invite you to join me for our upcoming Online Samhain Circle on Friday Nov 4th, 2022! We will do a guided meditation journey to connect with our ancestors, discover more about our inherited wounds, gifts and how to get the healing process going. First timers are free! Hope to see you there.

Serena

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